Whispers on Memory Lane
by Who really Knows
Summary: Naruto takes a trip to his home town which sends him down the rickety path of memory lane, and he ends up in a whole different place then where he started. *NOTE: This is a sequel to Whispers of the Party but does not have to be read in order at all (I hope) so tell me how I do on that
1. Chapter 1

**Part One: A Visit**

* * *

"So you're really going home?" Sai looked up from the small napkin where the outline of a bird was forming. They were sitting in a diner on lunch break, something they used to spend in some random closet or at their apartment in bed. But after about 5 years of being Naruto's boyfriend and another 9 spent in a strange friendship, their relationship had mellowed out. "Why now? You never go any other time?"

"Yeah, but it's been years and my Mom is sick. I have to go." Naruto stirred the contents of his coffee cup. Why did he order it in the first place? He didn't even drink coffee. "The last thing I want to do is go back there, trust me."

"It's because you haven't done anything with your life that you said you were going to, right?" Sai continued on, adding details to the bird with fine strokes, "Especially after you threw it in everyone's faces before you left that you were going to do something meaningful and they were all just going to sit around and rot for the rest of their lives."

"Thanks for summing that up Sai."

"You're welcome." Sai smiled, lifting the napkin for Naruto to see. "You want to keep this?"

Naruto took the napkin, folded it in two, and stuffed it in the side of his jacket pocket. The coffee cup sat in front of him, still filled to the brim and gave him a disappointing whimper when he stood up, "Well, I better go now...bye."

"Try not to kill yourself." Sai waved, pulling another napkin from the dispenser placed on the table.

Should he draw an Anaconda next?

* * *

He could turn around and drive back home.

Traveling wasn't a big deal to Naruto, you would think sitting still for so long would drive him crazy but he was so distracted by all the changes in the areas along the way and the assholes who couldn't drive to be worried about being bored. He could just observe, drive, and listen to insanely loud music.

Ten miles away from his hometown, his mind began to swarm with all his mistakes. Forcing him to pull over and turn off his car.

All of his old friends were going to laugh in his face, and there was no one to blame but him. He shouldn't have left the way he did, a dramatic post-graduation moment for him to look back on and shake his head at for the rest of his life.

But there was Mom to think about.

She already knew he was coming, too late to back out now. If he called and said anything he'd only be guilt-tripped into coming again and that would be a waste of money. Maybe he just could avoid everyone? That might just work, his hometown was small, but it wasn't that small, there had to be plenty of new people around to work with.

Yeah right. Naruto groaned, beating his head against the steering wheel, with that kind of thinking I'm probably just gonna run into everyone I knew.

Since when did he become such so pessimistic? Oh right, life hit him.

Naruto glared at the next three passing cars before turning the car back on and getting back out on the road. There could be no planning for this, not even a hint. Whatever happens, he'll just have to deal with it as it comes.

Easier said than done.

* * *

Midnight was the name of the hotel that Naruto checked into, it was also the time that he checked in. He was grateful to arrive so late at night and that the girl at the counter was some bratty teenager he didn't recognize who wore her blonde hair in a weird hairstyle and painted her nails a vivid red color, it gave him time to settle in.

The hotel room was nothing special, but the memories it brought with it were unwelcoming. In high school, Naruto participated in something absolutely crazy. An affair with Sasuke Uchiha, who was dating Sakura Haruno at the time. But it was after the break up that changed everything. He met Sai,befriended Sakura, Sasuke struggled to get him back, Naruto struggled to move on and in the end Naruto left to greener pastures and Sasuke ran away to Military school. End of story.

Man, it all sounds so simple when but like that. If only it was then.

Naruto woke up at nine the next morning, fully intending to sneak to his car and drive off towards the hospital ducked down low in his seat just in case someone he knew happened to be looking around at the wrong moment.

A knock on the door changed all that.

At first he thought he was hearing things, but when his door actually started to shake, Naruto knew he had to open it. He approached with caution, trying to rack his mind for what crime he could have committed in the middle of the night while sleepwalking. Naruto swung open the door and found himself crushed in a hug with the loud outburst of "NARUTO!" filling his ears.

Naruto was released and stumbled back into the door, clutching his chest. "Temari?"

A blonde curvy pregnant woman stood in his doorway,beaming at him. "Yep! I didn't know that you were in town?"

"I didn't tell anyone." Naruto arched an eyebrow with a silent plea that she keep it a secret, all she did was arch back and he knew it was safe. "Come in and sit down, why is it I always see you pregnant?"

"Because the lazy ass has too much energy in bed." Temari replied, lowering herself into a nearby chair. "I already have three kids, can you believe it? I don't feel that old? Karura is already 15 going on 16, that makes me...a very big number...This one was a surprise, well these ones were a surprise I should say."

"These ones?" Naruto gawked as he plopped down on the edge of the bed, pointing at her belly, "Multiple?"

"Twins." Temari smiled, hugging her stomach, "I haven't told anyone yet, so you keep my secret and I'll keep yours."

"Just like old times." Naruto let out an awkward laugh and for a moment the two looked each other over. Temari looked older, but radiant, she always did glow when she was pregnant from what he remembered though. He'd aged too, he was already 32 but many people often commented that he looked years younger. So did his Mom,genetics were playing in his favor.

"So how have you been since high school?" Ugh, the dreaded question of what had he done with his life.

"Uh, okay. I dated Sai for a long time but we broke up a few years ago, I still see him every once in a while and I work for a company as a manager, it's kind of been mind numbing but it pays the bills."

"Well that's good! I'm glad that you're a manager, I never pegged you for that." Temari smiled, the hormones must be playing in her favor today, she seemed unusually cheery. "I own this hotel! Shikamaru bought it after he got discharged from the military, he's been really involved with the kids activities since then so he's either hanging around here or filling in as a substitute teacher, teaching chess at the community center or hanging around with Kiba and Choji all day.I think you should talk to him, it seems like I spent half my marriage trying to get him motivated and now he is all of a sudden and there's nothing for him to do."

They were never friends in high school until a few months before the baby was born, he wasn't sure if Shikamaru would be interested in seeing him but Naruto only smiled and said, "Alright, I'm not sure what I could do to help but I'll see."

"Thanks." The smiled dimmed as she shifted in the chair and pressed a hand to her tummy, "The kicking is awful sometimes, ugh!"

"Uh, anything I can do to help?" He offered, rising off the bed, she laughed and shook her head so he sat back down. "So...how's Gaara?"

"He's okay. He just went through a divorce last month, so he's been staying in the hotel." Temari's eyes purposely strayed to the far wall.

"Wait...This hotel? Which room?"

"The one next to yours." Temari cringed as Naruto let out a small whimper, Gaara was his best friend in high school, but in their Senior year Gaara grew more and more distant. Naruto later learned that Gaara liked Sai, really liked him, and was kind of counting on his best friend not to date him.

Naruto let him down.

Losing Sasuke had been a blow but losing Gaara was a whole other issue in itself. "Do you think he would kill me?"

"No." Temari shook her head, "Gaara already saw you when you arrived through his window. He's the one who called me at one in the morning, debating if he should go over to your room or not and if you would lose your temper with him."

Naruto smiled, releasing a sigh of relief. "Thank God, you remember his temper?"

"You mean our temper?" Temari rose an eyebrow, flowing with memories of yelling at Shikamaru to fetch her random food for her cravings in the the middle of the night with creative death penalties spitting out of her mouth like hell-fire. He'd gotten used to it. "Too many things have changed around here. Did you know that Hinata is mayor?"

Naruto's jaw dropped, "Wha-No?"

"Yep, she was elected just this past year." She glowed with pride for her old friends accomplishments, "I never thought she would end up there, but looking back she was always the most diplomatic of all of us."

"That's crazy." Hinata was mayor, she had done something with her life and even with the slightest twitch of jealousy, Naruto was still happy for her. On the other hand, talking about what he'd missed was roaming down a list he wasn't sure he was ready for. "Um, I need to go visit my Mom. Do you think we can meet up later?"

"Your Mom? That's good. How about dinner tomorrow? We'll have a lot to talk about." Temari stood with the strategy of an experienced pregnant lady, "Yoshino called last night and nearly ate Shikamaru's head off through the phone because he hadn't been around to visit her, so we're going over later today. Shikaku passed away unexpectedly two years ago, since then we've been trying to convince her to move in with us but you know how she is."

"Oh, I remember." Naruto nodded, his eyes widening at the terrifying memories as he escorted Temari to the door, "She was a wicked one."

"Bye Naruto!"

"Bye." Naruto sighed against the door, resisting the urge to beat his head against the wood. He was just starting the day and already was heading down the vast path of memory lane.

In Shikamaru's words, it was troublesome.

* * *

"My baby!" Kushina glowed, shoving her poor husband off the bed and patting the new available space, "Sit down! Oh look at you, do you eat?"

"Yes Mom, I eat." Naruto grumbled, rolling his eyes.

"Your eyes are going to get stuck that way!" She smacked him before pulling him into a hug, "I missed you! Your Father's okay company, but he doesn't have that piece of me inside of him you know? And he doesn't like the comedies I do..."

"I know Mom, I'm here now so we'll watch all the comedies you want." He replied, looking his Mom over. Kushina was wearing a bandana over her head, the chemo had taken most her hair. Despite her sickness, she seemed vibrant and happy. That would be just like her though, why would he be expecting anything else? "How are you doing?"

"I'm doing alright." Her lips went up in the corner, forming a small smile for a brief split second before she poured into an outburst of Mom behavior, "What about you?! Are you seeing anyone? I want to see grandkids before I pass!"

"Mom." Naruto groaned, cradling his head.

"What?! I have every right to be concerned!"

"I haven't dated anyone other than Sai and Sasuke."

Kushina tensed so much that Naruto could literally feel it. She reached out and took his hand, curling her fingers around his palm, "I didn't just call you down here because I'm sick. Naruto...I'm sorry but Sasuke passed away."

Naruto blinked, craning his head,"What?"

"Just two weeks ago, it was a car accident. The funeral already passed."

"Nobody told me."

"People didn't know how to contact you anymore, and I didn't find out until the other day because of the chemo treatments I was getting out of state." Kushina squeezed his hand, "I'm so sorry."

"It's okay." Naruto swallowed, patting the side of his pant's pocket as if searching for something, anything. "Uh...I'm going to go, I'll come back and visit you tomorrow, okay?"

Kushina pressed her mouth in a thin line, holding back words, "Be careful."

Naruto managed to make it to the front seat of his care before reality sunk through the shock.

Sasuke's gone.

* * *

**SO there we have it, if you are reading this without reading the thing before it you're probably like "What Sasuke's dead?!" and if your someone has read Whispers of the Party then you are probably more like "What?! :O Sasuke's dead?!" So see, not much of a difference. **

**Sorry people. If it helps, I'm not even expecting any good reviews anyway...**

***runs to write next chapter* **


	2. Chapter 2

**Huh, I actually got this up today. Don't be surprised if you see part three pop up here, I've actually had this shiz written for awhile. (I'm worming my way through part four and five, both being written at the same time for...reasons.)**

* * *

**Part Two: Dinner**

Your Mom? That's good. How about dinner tomorrow? We'll have a lot to talk about.

Temari knew. He was more than sure that she knew, of course she did and she was going to tell him. But in the end, she must have figured it was best if he learned from his Mom.

She was right.

He tried to be angry, but the feeling wouldn't come. His temper was as cool as the breeze numbing his face. All he could think about is how the whole thing must be a practical joke. A car crash taking out Sasuke? That sounded like a tiger getting eaten by a rabbit.

"Can you get my ball?" The small push of tiny fingers in his side forced him down from his clouded thoughts. A kid with light brown eyes and orange hair stood in front of him, pointing under the picnic table where a large blue ball was resting beside Naruto's left foot. "Please."

Naruto picked up the ball, holding it out to the child with an age old grown up warning on his lips, "You shouldn't talk to strangers." Especially strangers in the park.

"You're not a stranger, you're Naruto! I know who you are!" The kid insisted, bouncing the ball once and running after it.

"Hey!" He called after the kid, but the little guy kept running, Naruto started to chase after him, grumbling about how he was getting too old for things like this, "Come back here!"

His lungs taught him of two things as he chased after the kid- he was out of shape and now understood perfectly why someone would put a leash on a child. The little kid started to slow his pace as he approached an old woman sitting on a bench, sewing something.

Naruto watched as the little boy pointed him out to the old lady. To his surprise, she waved a hand in greeting with a small smile gracing her face. Whoever these people were, he sure didn't remember them.

"Hello Naruto, it's been a long time." The woman set down her sewing materials as the kid bounced the ball against the sidewalk, "You don't remember me do you?"

"Uh-No." He laughed nervously.

"It's okay,I'm an old woman now." She smiled, "Nothing like your Mother, she hasn't aged a day. I'm Sasuke's Mom, Mikoto."

"Oh." Naruto crossed his arms, "Uh, sorry."

"It's okay." Mikoto scooted over on the bench, a non-verbal invitation to take a seat. He decided to take it, while in reality he would rather not deal with this right now and run away, there might not be another chance. Not to mention that he couldn't exactly turn down the Mother of his first true love.

Honestly, only true love.

"So.." Naruto decided to trace the outline of his shoe with his eyes, "What happened with Sasuke after I left?"

"Hm." She stared at me for a moment, before turning her attention to the boy, "Tunaro, will you go fetch me that big green box from the car?"

They only watched as the kid, Tunaro, ran to the car and struggled to carry a medium sized box toward the two. "It belonged to Sasuke, he left it to you."

"Me?" Naruto turned to her in disbelief.

"Yes, you." She reassured, "I think he wanted to tell you all he did with his life by himself."

That would be like him wouldn't it? He started to rise to offer the boy help but by that time, the green box was sitting at his feet. Why was it that he was alway too late? "Thanks."

"Anytime, don't be shy, come over whenever you like." Mikoto started to gather her things, "Your Mom knows my address, you can get it from her."

"Okay." He watched them leave, wondering who the little boy was. A part of him already had an inclination, but on a much closer level he did not want to know.

The more distance he kept, the better.

* * *

The stupid green box was abandoned in the corner of his hotel room, seated in a chair next to the small dinner table, as Naruto got ready for the dinner with Temari's family in about an hour. They lived just across the street from the hotel in a two story blue house with three cars and a trampoline sitting in the front yard.

To top it off there was still Gaara lingering in the next room. Did he know that Sasuke died too? Is that what's keeping him from coming over? Naruto ran his hands over his face, Sasuke's death was a place he didn't want to go.

He never got over Sasuke to begin with, sometimes he told himself that he was just a stupid teenager and should get over it already. Other times, he wondered if that stupid teenage self was on to something real and ruined it all by being prideful and unforgiving.

Most of the time he just hated himself for thinking about it.

"Come in." Shikamaru opened the door before he could even knock, "Watch out for Temari."

"I heard that!" Temari roared from somewhere in the house, Shikamaru visibly cringed for a split second before pulling Naruto through the house with a muttered complaint. "Closer to the due date she just get's harder and harder to handle."

"Did you just say handle?" They both jumped at the proximity of her voice, she was standing by the front door with her arms crossed, glaring. Naruto decided to take a moment and observe the Nara household's living room. Conclusion? There were far too many breakable objects in here. "Am I a dog?"

"No." Shikamaru shook his head, adding an afterthought of, "...honey."

"Sit!" Both men scrambled for a seat on the couch, avoiding her glare. Shikamaru was not afraid of non-pregnant Temari, especially after being in the military. Pregnant Temari was a whole other story, pregnant Temari once stapled him to the floor. "Naruto."

"Yes Ma'am!"

"Thanks for coming, dinner will be ready in about thirty minutes."

"Uh-okay." Naruto gave her what he hoped looked like a genuine smile and not a mixture of fear and apprehension. No matter what the smile looked like, Temari seemed satisfied with it and left the room all smiles. "Dodged a bullet?"

"For now." Shikamaru answered ominously, "I heard your Mom was in the hospital."

" practically dragged me down here." He was really hoping this wasn't going to lead into a conversation about Sasuke, since everyone and their Mother probably knew that his Mom broke the news to him by now. "I like your hotel, it's simple but comfortable."

"Thanks." and that is where the conversation pretty much ended, Shikamaru flipped on the TV and did not mention a thing about Sasuke, death, or ask about his feelings in any way shape or form.

Thank God.

He allowed himself to escape into whatever cop show was playing with the occasional outburst of "It's him! Are you that stupid?" and then Shikamaru would agree and change the channel to another cop show.

"Dinner!" Temari called after several repeats of that exact cycle.

Shikamaru practically bolted from his seat, sparing Naruto a glance as he warned, "Don't eat the cookies." The question was why not eat the cookies? Shikamaru wasn't the type to hoard food.

There was only one person he knew that would hoard a cookie.

"Son of a bitch." Naruto groaned, Gaara was here. He'd forgotten all about Gaara! Awkward moments where knocking on his future and he had no choice but to open the damn door. "A snails pace" had never before been used in a description of how he walked, but for the first time Naruto was the snail. The gooey, slimy, slow snail.

It sucked that the kitchen had to be so close to the living room.

Gaara was already sitting at the dinner table, talking to a boy who looked like Shikamaru's carbon copy, only about ten. The bratty teenaged girl from his check-in was seating on the other side of Gaara, glaring at the food in front of her.

Across from her was another little girl-who looked like a healthy mixture of the two other children-around five talking about her day at school with a pace that Naruto couldn't follow. He decided to take a seat next to her, even if that put him right across from Gaara.

"Are you Naruto?" The little girl snapped into instant interrogation the moment his butt touched the seat, he opened his mouth to answer but she only cut him off, "Can I paint your nails?"

"Shut-up Aiko, he doesn't want you to paint his nails." The bratty teenager-Karura, if he remembered correctly- gave her little sister a warning glare.

"How do you know?!" Aiko stuck out her tongue, turning her attention back on Naruto immediately, "Is she right? Do you really not want to paint your nails?"

"Uh..." Naruto found himself trapped between his man card and the big green eye gaze of a little girl with hope.

"He's a guy! He doesn't want to paint his nails!"

"Daddy lets me! And he's a boy!"

"Okay!" Shikamaru intervened as he took a seat at the head of the table, in-between his two daughters. "That's enough."

"But-"

"Enough." Naruto got the feeling that Shikamaru was directing his order towards him and not his daughters. He couldn't help it, Naruto just had to try checking Shikamaru's nails with an amused smirk on his face.

Temari was right about things changing around here.

"Hey." Green eyes met blue for the first time in more than a decade. To Naruto, it felt like a blink.

"Hey." Naruto smiled back.

"You guys are weird!" Aiko giggled, and from there everything proceeded as a normal Nara family dinner-complete with children's chatter,adult jokes, and embarrassed teenage groaning.

It was nice to breathe for a while.

* * *

"Damn-it Gaara! Where are the cookies?"

"He already left Temari." Shikamaru didn't bat an eyelash as his wife growled to the ceiling and stalked off to hunt for something sweet to satisfy her cravings.

"Thanks. I had a good time." Naruto and Shikamaru shared an awkward handshake for the first time in their lives, he'd never actually shook anyone's hand outside of work before?

"No problem." Naruto gave him one last-less awkward-wave from the bottom steps of the porch and started to move across the street.

"Wait." "Can I walk with you?"

Naruto clutched his heart, fake gasping for air, "I think that's the most polite thing you've said to be ever Gaara!"

"I'm legally accountable now." He smirked back, falling into step beside his old friend. "My ex-husband is a lawyer, met him in court they day I turned nineteen." (1)

"Seriously? That must have been one hell of a divorce."

"Yeah it was." The two fell into silence as the Midnight Hotel got closer, for a moment Naruto thought they might just end up saying a few quick good nights and going to sleep. Gaara must have been afraid of that, "I'm sorry about-"

"We were all stupid back then, if anything I'm the one that should be sorry." Gaara chuckled, stopping Naruto in his tracks. "Out of all the jokes I've ever heard you make, you choose now to laugh at one of them?!"

"You've never been very funny." Gaara's face was stoic but his eyes blazed with an old familiar flame that threatened to burn Naruto alive and eat his descendants.

"I missed you, Gaara." His tone must have sounded more sorrowful than he intended-he didn't know why, maybe it was because they were already their rooms-because Gaara took his hand.

"Here." Gaara pressed something into his palm, holding his hand tightly. "I saved it from the beach. Thought you might want it back someday."

A simple necklace chain dangled helplessly in his grasp,and he knew exactly what is was without unclasping his hand.

Without a doubt, that was an orange seashell engraving itself in his palm.

* * *

**1. I am currently writing a fic about this right now XD I'm not sure if it will be posted or not, we'll see. (more news in future updates, plus I want to work on "I'm a Lady" more)**

** I've been working on my original work SOOO much lately, which is great but I need a break :P All my writing mojo is getting sucked up!**


	3. Chapter 3

**ALRIGHT, this is the last one today, it's shorter but it has way more crap in it. Also there are references in it that come from Whispers of the Party, so idk go read it if you want. If not, they will be further explained in the next chapter. **

* * *

**Part Three: The Green Box**

The green box called his name from the corner of the room. Almost as if it was Sasuke himself sitting in the chair instead of the box, staring at him with the silent plea just to talk. Just him, Sasuke and a hotel room-it was like old times.

Was it possible to avoid something forever? After having such a good night, Naruto was hoping so. The orange seashell necklace jingled against his shirt, pressing the memories further and further into the front of his mind.

Naruto approached the green box, running his hands against the flat hard surface of it's top before curing a finger under the lid and lifting it up. Envelopes were filled in an annoyingly organized fashion, typical of Sasuke.

He snorted, running his fingers along the line and picking up an envelope at random. Inside was one sheet of paper with neat typed words.

_Naruto,_

_There are so many things that I wanted to say to you all those years ago, instead I wasted time spewing stupid nonsense at you all the time instead of proving my love for you. Itachi was right, I was a kid but I'm not anymore._

_And what really sucks about that is that I still can't do anything._

_I want you to be happy, I want you to wake up everyday with that smile on your face and accomplish all those things that you said you were going to do. I hope you have that with Sai, I hope you find that and he gives you everything I ever wanted to._

_I heard about your graduation outburst? Did you do that because of what I did? I know that I promised I would be there, sure we were together when we promised but I still let you down._

_It seems like treating you like shit is all I can do._

_Sorry,_

_Sasuke_

This was just months after graduation, how long ago was that? Fourteen years? Thirteen? Naruto's numb mind couldn't remember. He placed the opened envelope and letter on the table and moved the green box on the floor.

He'd need a seat for this.

Naruto randomly selected another envelope from the selection, the new light revealed more envelopes stacked underneath. Maybe this was a form of punishment-Sasuke was well aware of his hatred for reading.

_Naruto._

_There's this boy I adopted, have you heard? It's been three years already, which is hard for me to imagine. It seems like just yesterday I wasn't getting any sleep and trying to figure out how to change a diaper correctly._

_I named him Tunaro, an anagram of your name. I was going to name him Naruto, but it was just too painful to say. It had an effect on his personality,He's just like you, he's loud and imaginative and when he gives her those big eyes I can't refuse him. Well, I don't know if you're like that anymore but it's the you I remember._

_I wonder what it would be like if you were here with me and we were raising him together. It's not something I try to think about, it just comes without warning. My Father and I are no longer talking, Mom finally divorced him after years of fighting and confessed to me that she knew about what happened between us and that she was okay with it._

_She was already too late though, unfortunately._

_When Itachi told her about the photographs and how everything happened, she was disgusted. Back then, I didn't understand why but now that I have Tunaro I understand. I could never do that to him. I love him._

_Thinking of you,_

_Sasuke_

So that boy at the park was Sasuke's son. Even if he wasn't direct blood. Photographs? What photographs was Sasuke talking about? Naruto stared down at the rows, Sasuke was an organizer, not just in the way things were arranged but how. It would only make sense they were in the order that he wrote them.

It's funny the things that never changed.

Naruto choose the envelope behind the second letter, hoping it would bring more clarity to whatever Sasuke was talking about.

_Naruto,_

_It's Valentine's day, not the best holiday but it was the only one I celebrated with you. Turano and I went to the beach today and made seaweed wigs. Sometimes I worry that because he's so much like you were, I'm trying to feel connected with you in some way. I don't know if that's a good thing, but I'm trying not to do it._

_Too much of having my cake and trying to eat it too._

_None of that makes any sense, but I don't think it has to. To be honest, I hate myself for letting you go, I hate myself for not getting in a car and hunting you down. I hate myself for being too much of a coward to recognize what I had. And if I chased you, I'd hate myself because I have no right to._

_Beside even if I did, we've both changed I'm sure. I hope not sometimes, but I've never been the optimistic one, that was always you. Kiba has told me that "I'm less of an asshole and more like a person." and Sakura says that "I'm more open." To be honest, even though it must be true, I don't get that impression. The only thing I think I open up to is this word document._

_I'm just afraid that I'd just ruin everything. We had months together, just months, but it felt like a lifetime of happiness._

_And I don't want to lose that._

_Sincerely,_

_Sasuke_

Seaweed wigs? Oh man, he remembered those. His Mom was the one who showed him how to make them. Naruto ran his hand against the seashell necklace, he got from Sasuke for valentines day-and later threw it to be lost in the sand. Figures Gaara would be the one to dig it out, he always was the best at finding things at the beach.

And the lifetime of happiness. Naruto understood that. He understood it so much that it boiled his blood, for the first time since he heard of Sasuke's death, Naruto was feeling real anger. That idiot, that was Sasuke's line and he had every right to steal it.

The anticipation of finding out what photographs Sasuke was talking about deteriorated as Naruto stared at the envelopes with his hands clasping the arms of the chair. What the hell was Sasuke thinking? Leaving him all this.

He reached down and picked another.

_Naruto,_

_I feel crazy. You must be in love with Sai by now, maybe you've even adopted a kid or something. I know that I'm never going to send these letters, that it's just a way for me to talk to you but I wonder if it's okay that I'm hanging on so hard. I've tried to let go several times and it's just impossible._

_I love you._

_I have no doubts about it and it makes me insane. I've always loved you. Do you remember that night? We were both drunk, and you threw that plotted plant out of a window? When we ran into each other outside I lost myself staring at you, there was just something about you that was...captivating. You'll always have that effect on me, I don't think it's going to ever go away no matter how many other guys I date or see. There will never be another love like yours._

_Just so you know, you were right that day, I do love all that "lovey-dovey-crap"._

_Love, Sasuke_

They were both crazy, obsessive, cowards. Naruto cradled his head and allowed himself to breathe, willed it more like. If he could go back, he'd punch his young stupid self in the face. Naruto wondered at least a hundred times a day what it would be like if he never left Sasuke. He'd be in a whole different place right now, a different person. He'd have love and a kid, a family.

He was tempted to close the box, shove it in a dark corner and never look at it again. But the idea was so close to what he used to do, so similar, that Naruto couldn't bring himself to do it.

There was one letter that stood out at the very end of the row, the last one in a blue envelope of all things.

_Hey Naruto,_

_I know what I'm going to do with these letters now, I want to give them to you when I die. I'm afraid that when we're old, you'll go first but for once in my life I'm relying on hope. Now that I know you'll be reading them, I'm forcing myself not to go over them because I want you to be more open with you than I ever have._

_When we were together, I was very selfish and my pride got in the way of what should have been the most important thing in my life, you. When I die, you'll be the last thought in my head I'm sure. With all the regret I carry, being with you is never one of them. Even the ugly memories, the parts that make me hate myself, are precious._

_My favorite memory of us fighting was when we got into a ridiculous argument over my organization obsession and it got so bad you tried to hit me, but then I kissed you and we became so blind that we tripped and fell on the table and...did things on top of the broken pieces. Isn't it crazy that two people could be so passionate? I guess that's what people call young love. Just so you know, I still do that thing with my pencils where I line them up according to size and shape, and every once in a while I mess them up just for you._

_The memory of when I first actually realized I was in love with you was just some random Wednesday night, we were just laying in bed together and you were ranting about something Gaara said to you earlier that day. It was an odd moment, because you weren't doing anything especially luring. Your hair was messed up, your eyes looked tired and you were covered in hickeys all over your neck. But you were being you and I was being me.I'd never actually been me before, it's strange to think that I could in front of you. Sure, there was no great moment with fireworks and candles but it was special._

_My favorite memory of you, just you, was when we went to the beach, our last weekend together. It's just this random image of you that got stuck in my head when we were walking down the pier hand in hand, and your smile looked brighter than ever that day. I remember thinking about how happy you looked and how I wanted you to be that way all the time. When I die, I think that will be the last image of you in my head because it's everything I want for you to be, that image, and everything that I could ever hope for you._

_I want you to know that losing you...just hurt, it hurt in this indescribable way like an ache that you can't touch. But over time it got better, and though I miss you every day there is something within me that accepted you were gone. I guess what I'm trying to say is, in a way I've managed to move on too. I have Turano and I've made friends with Sakura over the years and even Shikamaru. So if you miss me, I don't know that you will, know that it's okay, I'm okay, we're okay._

_And you were the best thing that ever happened to me._

_Good-bye, Sasuke_

Naruto shoved the letter away, "Fucking bastard."

* * *

**yup, that's how it ends. I wanted it focused more on the letters-which yes, sicken me with their sappyness-but what am i going to do? Oh well *runs off to write next chapter***

**Also my grammar-spell check is being an asshole, so tell me if you see anything weird.**


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